It is not easy for yourself nor for the people around you if you are very moody. We are often pretty fast with judging others and it’s easy to blame others for our bad mood. For example if those people who we love, do not offer those things to us which we expect them to do, then we can easily be depressed or become aggressive without even realizing that we are overreacting or freaking out. Being moody is a nightmare for yourself, because those up’s and down’s can really make yourself kind of crazy and feeling strange… and your family, friends and colluegues barely understand what is going on in your mind. How should they?
If you meet me or know me you might think that I am one of those calmest persons in the world, easy-going, peaceful and always ready for helping others if they are in need. Friendly, bright and shining towards others all over my face. For sure, that might be a very lovely description of my character traits. But that is just one part of my personality.
If I am not in balance, then I am very unpatient, fast overwhelmed, I will easily take a swipe at somebody and acting like a toddler does, if he/she wants that piece of chocolate but is not allowed to eat it any more.
I am curious by nature, but if my bucket is full, I will explode and perhaps freak out somehow. There is a thin line by being nice to people and helping them or feeling used by people. If I realize that somebody wants to use me… and tries to cross my personal boundaries then the game is over and I will be not nice at all anymore. I am open-minded and always try to improve myself. But self-protection is very important if you tend to overwork or exhaust yourself and tend to be moody once in a while.
Does that sounds familiar to you?
If so, you might be a moody person too. It does not matter if your mood changes very often or if you just get moody if you get stressed out…or after a couple of weeks or several month.
Being a moody human is stressful for ourselves, because if you get at that stage which is dark you will regret to do things or say things which you never would do or say if you are balanced and happy:
- you are taking something personally
- you cannot control yourself anymore.
- you are already full and not interested in any comments or explanations of other people
- you need a time-out, but cannot get out of that stressful situation
- you feel overwhelmed by thoughts, feelings and noise
- you wish to be in a dark place to get empty again
If some of those things happen to you…you can be sure that you are overwhelmed and will get moody soon.
There are several hacks, which helped me personally to be less moody on a daily basis and to be a balanced person, who can really enjoy her life.
It took a long road to discover, that its okay to feel overwhelmed and to be prepared for those situations, which help you to calm down and get back on track.
If you are suffering from being moody in your past or present then hopefully my 5 Life-hacks will help you to improve your temper and to not need that evil mood anymore in your life. I am honest with you…. it will improve…not delete your moody character trait. But it is a great game changer, if you want to stop hurting yourself and others. Because if you are moody, you can also tend to fall into a stage which is similar to a depression, and pretty self-made, because of doubts and feeling bad about being different then the mainstream is.
Furthermore you will be more aware about yourself and those you love and you can finally realize that the moody feeling is often just a stage if you miss to express yourself in a proper way.
So let’s just jump into my hacks:
1. Create ME-Time, find your why…try to reflect about yourself
We are all very busy. Our lifes are full of to-do’s, expectations and schedules. We are surrounded by people, and our phones are always close to us and distracting us, because there is a new whatsapp message coming popping up or somebody is postings something interesting…and we check those social media feeds.
Actually we spend so much time with other people and their opinions or views on things. But how often do you spend time with yourself? How much attention do you give yourself per day? Do you have a specific point, where nobody is calling you? Where nobody is sitting next to you at all and you can just lean back and close your eyes to be totally yourself without being observed by others? A time where you can just reflect about yourself? About your own thoughts? Feelings? Visions? Goals?
As a mompreneur I could sing a song about that “holy me time”, which is so easily interrupted by a child which wakes up or refuses to fall asleep. Sometimes a potential costumer who things that I am really available at evening too…calls me- would you answer evening calls? Seriously? After work hours should be relaxed and quiet without interruption right?
It does not matter if you sit at 3 a.m. at the kitchen table drinking a mug of tea and reflecting about yourself, or if you create a 20 minutes break-time at the end of your day, where you find peace in a bathtube and surround yourself with nobody else like yourself and water… a small bite of time, literally just for you (5min. to 1 hour). Just connecting with yourself, your body, mind and soul is a huge game changer, just calming down and releasing of all those daily input we have.
During our busy days we are pretty fast overwhelmed without even realizing that. That stimulus satiation needs to be stopped by ourselves. If we check our Instagram-accounts before we sleep we will easily scroll 30 minutes without realizing that we are just busy with the stuff of others, allthough we could refill our emotional battery with just calming down and falling asleep. If you need to wake up early you will feel the outcome of consuming social media at late night at this point, if you feel tired and probably use the snooze button, to get a few minutes of sleep.
Less sleep is one of the main factors which switches us easy-going humans to those moody ghosts who suffer from their sleep deprivation. You might be functioning, but being happy and productive does look differently.
You should really create a good sleep routine. You can write a journal at the evening to calm down and get all those thoughts out of your mind. You will wonder how good you can sleep, after letting go of all these stuff which is cruising around in your head.
2. Learn to express your feelings!
The main problem in human relationships is that many of us did not learn to express our own feelings. In our western society usually the people need to function and behave. That is the reason why we did not learn to send those: Me-Messages like: “I am unhappy with that situation.” Instead of this we learned to put a finger on somebody and tell him/her that he or she is guilty for that circmstance: “You make me unhappy!”.
And the problem is, that nobody can know by that speech, especially men will not understand the WHY. It’s a general claim, with a personal hurt. You are responsible for my unhappiness! WHAT?! That sounds unfair. Why? Why am I making you unhappy, please?
Instead of this you might try to express your feelings in a proper why, which is not hurting others: “Today I am feeling very unhappy. The fact that you did not talk to me at all, made me feel unattractive and bad. Why did you ignore me?”
That would be a proper way to express your feelings and thoughts. You feel bad about a certain behaviour and ask the other person about the reason of that circumstance. Perhaps the person did ignore you because he was mad about you. If so, perhaps he will tell you about the reason. But it could also be something else. For example: Your spouse had a conflict with a colleague at work and is still thinking about that at home. He is not realising that you need his attention and that he is acting dark towards you. He is still in his own world with his own thoughts and by overthinking his own conflict he does not recognize that there is arising another conflict in his home with you….if you would know the reason for his behaviour, would you still guess that he would ignore you because of YOURSELF, your appearance or attitute?” Problably not.
The reason of most conflicts in our life is that we do not express our expectations towards those people we love. And then we wonder why we feel bad.
But they often do not realize that they did hurt us, because we do not express that mindfully. A generally spoken message will never help us forward in a relationship. We need to dive deeper, if we want a meaningful relationship with our spouse. If we do not know what the other one is expecting or seeking for, how could we fulfill each other needs?!
We are often just thinking of expressing facts. Like: “The garbage bin is full!” And then we wonder why nobodys is reacting towards our statement and finally we are always responsible to empty that garbage bin.
If we ask somebody else to empty that garbage bin, it would be more specific. Communication is not easy, I know. But we can learn to improve our skills to get better results and to streamline our dialogues, especially with those people who we love:
- Send Me-Messages: I am feeling tired of…. not “You never do that for me…blame on you..!”
- give the other person a space to answer and react. If you express yourself by performing a monologue in front of the other person, then the other person will be easily frustrated and just stop talking to you, because you really do not listen at all.
- Learn to listen. Although you might not like what you are hearing at this time period. Be quiet and stay calm.
- If somebody is getting loud and wild, then you should always remember: Not the loudest person is right! The smartest is the one with the magical weapon. So try your best to stay calm, clear and loyal.
- If you say something which is really unkind, you cannot erase those words. The bad speech of you will be repeated in the mind of that other person over and over again.
3. Find a routine which helps you to be more easy-going!
Many moody people are kind of overambitious. They demand a great deal of themselves and of others. But even if you are high-flying and self-disciplined you cannot do it all by yourself. You will soon realize that you need some help or that you need to let go of perfection to be happier.
The best idea is to create a place where you feel comfy. A home which is your heaven, where you can recharge yourself and relieve stress. I already mentioned the power of journaling and taking a bath. Successful and famous people do that on a daily basis to be calm and happy.
Ask yourself: If I would have more time, what would I love to do more often? As adults we forget to be playful and spontanious. We are often less creative and cannot find time for those things which makes us happy. If you spend more time with your hobbys then with netflix and social media, you will immediately feel better. Thats a promise. If you like to paint, then paint. If you want to play tennis? Then find time for it. You always dreamed of learning to drive a boat? Hey, why you don’t do it? Don’t waste your time with things which you are not burning for. You will just become moody, if you spend your time with people you don’t like and with activities which are boring just to feel safe. Stay exited… explore new things and give yourself a possibility to change to the good.
Be kind to yourself. The most painful thing in the world is our own criticizm. How many times do you tell yourself, that you are not good enough, not attractive enough, not tough enough? Why don’t you focus on those things you are happy with?
You should tell yourself every day, that you deserve to live that life which you are hoping for. That you are smart enough to reach your goals, that you are powerful and creative and do not need a confirmation of other people for that.
Being in peace with yourself is the key to be calm and easy-going. You can imagine “a better you”, which you want to establish as soon as possible. But be kind to yourself while you are on that journey. Be grateful for your own progress!
Don’t bring yourself down just because you are so ambitious and did not already get to that high point which you want to reach. Smile to your face if you look into the mirrow, be proud and happy about yourself.
- Listen to music
- Read books with positives thoughts and motivation
- be peaceful with yourself.
- Be grateful for what you are and already can or have achieved
- be gentle to the people you are loving. Don’t blame them if they don’t want to be as ambitious as you are. They are different then you, accept differences.
- Try new things out and if you like them, schedule them into your routine.
- Combine to do’s you don’t like with rewards afterwards
- or find other people who do those scores for you and do something else instead of that stuff you don’t like to do.
- Be creative. Think out of the box. Just for fun.
- Try to take thinks not so serious as you usually do. It might seem very hard, but you can learn to be easy-going step by step.
4. Exercise to create a better mood
Of all of that hacks, this point is the most important one for me. That is the reason why it helps so much. By working out you express yourself physically, you get rid of all that thoughts and feelings. Literally doing sports will free your mind. For me its a very important routine, because it’s like checking-out of that reality for a while.
If I exercise in the evening while our kids already sleep, it is my “Me-Time”, where I really reflect and get a lot of great ideas. It’s really a part of my routine and makes me easy-going, more productive and happier on a daily basis. If I can’t work out, I will tend to be more moody. Then probably my husband will say: “You just should have a great workout again to refresh your mind!”
Until I have that time for me, I can really clear myself. Its liberating and makes you feel so much better. You will feel proud of yourself and be so powerful. By having a shower or bath afterwards you calm totally down and will be absolutely yourself.
I know that many successful people swear about the power of exercising daily, and its really amazing how happy you become afterwards. The hormon of happiness called dopamine will literally make you smile. So, please give that exercise thing a try.
Even if you don’t like sports you will not regret to work out. You can just start by having a walk or doing little work outs here and there. But by integrating sports to your daily routine, your will soon realize how wonderful that investment in yourself is. It will help you to become stronger, happier and you will feel more attractive too.
5. Check your body!
Sometimes we easily get moody, because we have a lack of something. It might be a emotional reaction, of course. But in some cases it is physical. Pregnant women for example are very famous for being moody. While they are happy at one minute, at the next minute they feel afraid and overwhelmed with all those changes of their body and their life- its natural.
Check your blood once in a while.
Did you know that if our body has a lack of magnesium you probably strive to eat chocolate? But if you often do that, you will probably gain weight and then you will feel bad about yourself. So perhaps if you are active you just need some extra magnesium which you can easily consume by eating more bananas or some vitamin-pills.
Awareness is one of the important things in your life. If you know you have some issues then don’t ignore the signs. Take yourself serious and try to live as healthy and self-reflected as you can in order to be happy, calm and less moody.
There are many women who are suffering by hormonal up and downs without even realizing it. They feel like they are sitting in a rollercoaster and cannot handle that. If you live together with a very moody person, you should take care of the WHY too. You can offer your help and ask the person if she/he feels overwhelmed and which help you should offer to feel better.
Are you moody too? Which of that 5 hacks is your favorite one? Do you sometimes find yourself overthinking and overreacting at a certain point? Do you have other hacks, which you can recommend to help us to be less moody?
I would love you to comment and share your insights with me about being moody… if you already follow my blog thank you so much. If not consider to subscribe down below with your email adress to not miss any post again.