Lately I was wondering about some handsome people who were speaking about love, relationships and marriage issues in public. While I was waiting in a public place waiting for an appointment I heard one of those persons of the group pointing out that a human being should fall in love just once in a life-time.
He said that real love, means loving somebody who you want to share the whole life with. They discussed a little bit about that speech and I explored that people think so diverse about love as much as people are different of each other.
There might be a key to love, but the most exciting about is, that the keyhole depends on the person you admire. People fall in love with each other, sometimes its love at the first sight.
I know that many people love to read true love stories and that they think they can learn from the issues of the characters. That is way I want to write about one of my costumers, who instructed me to organize his civil wedding in Denmark with his lovely wife a few month ago. As he told me his story I was really impressed about the power of love and the way god (our you might say destiny) changes situations to the good.
The man I am telling you his story about is living in Germany but has Turkish roots. As a young boy he was living in that Turkish village. As he grew older he saw that girl which was living in his village too, and he really felt impressed by her appearance as well as her charisma. He was young, she was even younger then him and he did miss to tell her about his feelings towards her. Unfortunately he did not dare to tell her about his feelings because he was afraid of refusal and felt too shy.
Suddenly his parents decided to move to a bigger township in order to achieve a better work situation for their family and a qualified education for their son. He felt bad about the move, but he could not do anything to prevent it.
In the big town he explored his new areal after a while and finished his school quite well. As he started studying in university he met this girl of his childhood again.
Her brother who had moved a few years before to the same township had invited his family to his home and the little sister wanted to take a view inside that big university building.
The man saw her, but again felt to shy to speak with her. After a few months he was invited to a party, as well as his parents. The news melted his heart: His girl had already married a guy of the university campus who did speak to her and speak with her parents too.
It was an arranged marriage. The girl married him because she wanted to listen to her parents advice who always told her to marry as young as possible and move to the big township, in order to have a better life then in their village. She listened to them and moved to her husband very soon.
The man decided to leave turkey in order to work in Germany. It was the time as a lot of German companies hired Turkish workers in their factories. The man I am writing about had studied engineering and his qualities were a guarantee for a great salary.
He left turkey and started a new life in Germany. He learned the German language and he enjoyed the life in Europe. Meanwhile his parents went back to their village. Without their son they felt lost in the big town, the preferred to go back to their village where all their relatives and friends had their homes.
After a few months living in Germany the man felt in love with a german girl. She was the opposite of himself and his passion for her was amazing. Although they both were so different they really loved each other very much. More about twenty years they lived together as a couple and had children too. A few times they went to turkey as a family visiting all his relatives. The german wife was accepted and loved by his family too.
After one of that vacations his wife became pretty ill. In Germany she went to a hospital and the doctors did found a couple of tomours in her body. They did their best to rescue her from that disease, but they totally failed. The advanced case did not allow to rescue her anymore. After that emergency surgery the man left home as a widow.
It was a hard time for him. He was totally overstrained. He was not able to take care of himself nor to look after his children who reminded him of his wife every single day. He got really depressed and felt helpless.
Additionally after a while he got a call of his smaller brother who was still living with his parents in the turkish village. He asked him to visit them as soon as possible, because their father became very ill. Immediately he travelled to his old village. His children were in school and their german grandmother took care of them so far.
In the village he was very welcome. The neighbours felt so blessed that he came back again. His father was really ill and just wanted to see his oldest son again before leaving this world. He told him: “Love is an issue which can fall into oblivion. People fall in love and loose their beloved. But sometimes just God knows best and which destiny is the right one for us!”
After that speech his father closed his eyes and died. The man was overwhelmed. The funeral took three days. A lot people of the village paid their last respect to the father of that man. Surprisingly the girl who he felt for as a boy did visit his family too, in order to express her condolences.
And that moment was magical. He just felt the phrases of his dad in his heart while she was standing in front of him: “Love is an issue which can fall into oblivion. People fall in love and lose their beloved. But sometimes just God knows best and which destiny is the right one for us!”
That girl, who now was a middle-aged woman, still was the most beautiful thing in his eyes. Her charisma made him feel silent and pleasurized.
She lifted him up by saying encouraging words and he felt less depressed as she told him about her own loss a few month ago. Her husband died a few month ago by a car accident. She told him that her marriage was not a quite happy one but that he respected her very much, although she did not get pregnant all over the years.
After a while they decided to meet each other a couple of times. She told him, that she was very young as she got married and that she did not knew how it feels to love somebody without expectations. She also told him that she thought that she does not deserve a better marriage because she was not able to give birth to children for her husband.
The man went back to Germany and he gave her the promise to come back again. As his children had a long vacation they went back to the village for a few weeks. The woman who was a widow too, went back to the home of her parents after her loss. The man deeply felt in love with this woman and she realized that love can happen too.
After that holiday he decided to marry her and bring her to Germany. For this reason he contacted me in order to get married in Denmark. It was quite surreal, because he finally married that girl which he one’s felt for. But they really enjoyed their travel to denmark and are now living together as husband and wife in Germany.
This story offers us so many lessons:
- Firstly sometimes you meet somebody you might feel attracted to but at this certain situation it is not the right time to get closer. Maybe you meet somebody who is already married or engaged or in a partnership. It would be worse to destroy another bond just because you think it could be the perfect person for yourself.
- Secondly you might recognize how destiny can put two people together again, even if they are far away from each other. Their is a speech which says that you meet every person at least two times in your life and that is the truth.
- Thirdly you should never act impatiently, because often you don’t know how a loss can turn out as a gift for you afterwards. Never quarrel with yourself about your destiny.
Most people can fall in love for a couple of times in life. It is up to their lifestyle and their connection with their inner power how they turn out.
I did organize a few weddings for those who got divorced or widowed before and did found the right partner for the next period of life afterwards.
People change and their life’s changes too. It’s impossible to just stay in one status quo. So please, never feel bad about your feelings, dreams and thoughts. Destiny knows best. Stories like that of ones of my couples show me the impact of love and destiny.
I personally assume, that every human is free and can easily lose his/her heart for somebody. But its up to that circumstances if a relationship or a marriage is possible with that special person. I think everybody has various chances to connect with the right partner, but fewest realize that they were meant to each other.
How do you think about love? Do you think you just can love one’s in a live time or do you think people will love others for a while and can find love again? If you are not married right now, which value is the most important for you in life, which you want to share with your future-wife/future-husband?
Feel free to comment. It would be a pleasure for me to get some answers of my readers! I would love to read about your personal point of view!